A Predicament

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

There is this really really fat lady who sometimes shows up to work at the same time I do. She always takes the stairs (which I'll give her props for; there are several other fat ladies half her size who take the elevator on a regular basis – and we only have two floors – on the other had she is also a member of "Tasty Treat Tuesdays"…) Anyway, due to her size she is incredibly slow walking up the stairs and this has lead to many uncomfortable situations with me stuck behind her walking three steps per minute. If there is a "normal" sized person walking up these stairs it is no problem to walk right past them at a faster speed, although normally this is not necessary. No such luck with this voluptuous beauty.

 

So this morning, when I walked in the door, I saw her a couple feet from the stair door so I made an abrupt emergency turn down the hallway to the right. She glanced back just in time to see me turn and I'm pretty sure she knew what I was doing because she knows I have no reason to turn that way…. But I think she was thankful just the same. So I hung out in the break room for a minute or two and then listened by the stair door to wait for the click of the other stair door.

 

It can be just as awkward if I get to the stair door before she does because then I'm stuck with the decision of running up the stairs as fast as possible to avoid that awkward moment of holding the door for her since she seems close enough that it would be rude to let the door close in her face, yet in reality it's gonna take half an hour for her to reach it, or to walk as slow as possible so that you reach the door at the same time. This takes more skill because you have to find something to "occupy your attention" in a way that would naturally lead to slow walking, such as typing a three page essay via cell phone.